I have been thinking a lot about sex lately.
No, not a mid-life crisis.
Not an identity crisis.
More of a spirituality crisis.
Removing my self from the Body of Christ (I am not just interchanging words here with the institution) is similar to not being intimate with my wife, which is more than a physical intimacy. This intimacy must be open and deep. Not surfacy and cliched like a Barry White song. Nakedness and vulnerability go hand in hand (pun intended). Breathing in each other and "knowing" each other takes commitment and trust, more than program and showing up. We think this can be accomplish by coming to "worship" on a Sunday morning for an hour will be enough foreplay to bring us into a rhythm that brings our hearts together but it is too much of a cheap date that doesn't take much thought or understanding of the needs of the whole body. A sermon and hymns or praise songs are as intimate as a kiss and a grope. I leave feeling uninvested in and probably won't get a call in the morning. I am not putting out anymore for a one hour stand.
Deep conversations that come from deep inside that touches something deep inside of us is what is needed. Touch is important. We want to be moved by a passion that would stir our passion, not a academic powerpoint on the anatomy of The Body. No flannel. Flesh. Tears. The warm embrace of Truth that dispels fear but keeps us in contact with The One who drove out fear. Rationalizing away the fear doesn't do it, because the fear is within us as well as without. Being alone and told that I am alone doesn't take away loneliness. I need to smell the fragrance in the neck of the Redeemer.
It is good to understand how it works and what goes where but at some point we need to put down the pointer and overheads and get it on. It will be a bit messy and we may need to clean up some afterwards but isn't it better than a sterile environment which never lets you work up a sweat? We have been created to be vulnerable and in rhythm with The Lover of our Soul yet we don't allow anything that would keep the tempo. We have gotten too established to show any cleavage of our heart. We keep it very buttoned up and proper to allow anything that would attract us to The Lover. We make it too much about Romans and not enough about Songs of Solomon.
Marriage is to show the relationship between Jesus and his bride (us). I don't want a notice coming in the mail saying that our union is annulled because of sexual incompatibility...
6 comments:
i read somewhere that that is why the Jewish people rock when they pray...someone can completely dispell this if they want. i read it though i know it.
newly married... i appreciate this.
Speaking of The Body, we need more of us to begin reclaiming sex. A friend of mine is considering writing his thesis on living in an undersexed society, basically unwilling to call what passes for sexuality in our culture sex any more than you would call a Powerwheel a car or a showerhead a waterfall. Thanks for getting the conversation started up, it's one that we can all benefit from. Sex might be messy but it's not dirty, might be scary but it's not malicious.
One question that I have struggled with is the single's experience of the mystery of Christ and the sexual metaphor. What do you think about it?
I am not sure that is an issue, M. At some place and time a conversation has to be had and it needs to come out from the back room of intimidation and on to the table of maturity.
I am learning something from Scott, the new E.D., there will always be something that keeps us from doing something good, so let's start doing something good and asking people to deal with reality that doesn't benefit them.
That is one of the issues of sex, some get to do it and some have to wait. This keeps us from talking even to those who are doing it. I think this affects us spiritually as well as culturally. When we only look at it as a mechanical part of marriage and not a door to intimacy.
We need to grow up, quit thinking about it like Junior Highers and enjoy it in the context of marriage.
I like your new photo up there...and this is good, Tony. Honest. I like it.
Below are some of my favorite words from the chapter "The Grand Affair" in John Elderedge's
book "The Journey of Desire."
"To give yourself over to another, passionately and nakedly, to adore that person body, soul, and spirit-we know there is something special, even sacramental about sex. It requires trust and abandonment, guided by a whole hearted devotion. What else can this be but worship?"
This is how I want to worship my Maker. I have to "come towards to kiss." He is breath (life) to me.
"When we see each other in God's great kingdom- We will hold each other's hands, and far better than that. The naked intimacy, the real knowing that we enjoy with God, we shall enjoy with each other... I think we shall be able to pass into and through each other's very souls as we please, knowing each other's thought and being, along with our own."
I want this in community (I look forward to it in Heaven).
Btw- I like your new photo too, and I so appreciate your words.
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